Musings of an Anonymous Indian

Hi! It has been a long time that I did not write. I know that I didn’t have any pure motivation like money or a need to survive to write a blog post. Neither I have any money-making agenda (for now) on making this website and blog. But I promised myself that I will make a routine of writing, whether I write in my own journal-diary or this blog post. I wanted to create a good habit of writing-writing anything. I know that I broke a promise to myself, and it is more self-destructive than breaking a promise of someone else. For the promise that you make to yourself and whether you follow them or not, reflects your will and determination. Yes, I know I have been feeling blues for past few weeks. I know that is due to me being burdened by my academics. But you know what, when you want something, and you really want to do something, you make time for that thing.

Now after making that statement, I can understand that sometimes that is not the case. Like, sometimes your life does not allow that to happen. And sometimes, the only thing that you can do is take a break from something you love. Sometimes. Obviously my way of keeping up with my life was self-destructive (with me avoiding my responsibilities and keeping my nose into fictional stories, despite knowing that I should not do this), and getting interested in something else, in which I should not be interested at that time. You all might have heard of this saying or something related to it: “There is time for everything to happen.” Yeah, I kind of believe in this as well. But like the person I am, I follow my “gut” and go through what I want to do, and not what I should do. That leads me to sometimes satisfy my instant gratification, and I feel that is not something I, as a student should do. But then that is me and the environment and the values in which I grew up.

The title of this blog post is Straying from my own taken Path, because being a science student was my decision. Going the path of research, was my decision and my path. But I am not liking this path now. I am not liking this path which leads to a certain destination. I still have some remnants of interest in research, but I want to follow another path, want to explore other interests, and then come to a resting destination. My interests like photography, art, making craft things and selling them, making aesthetic things, liking aesthetic feed, taking interest in science like a side project that I want to do while I do 10 other stuffs, travelling and other things, is trying to make me feel very disinclined towards the mainstream research path that we all need to do. Like, now I am interested in making stickers, and want to sell them. I want to sell some Hospital Playlist stickers, fully made by me. I want to learn more about the techniques and science behind the photography. I know a little about the science behind the photography and the intuition behind the composition of pictures. But now I want to know more. Yeah, I am fickle-minded like that.

But would like to tell you guys that it is okay to feel like that. It is okay to feel that you have strayed from you own path, and would like to follow another path. We all have seen in fictional world as well as real world, how some people changed their life paths by straying from their own original path, and also made it big. What I want to say is that, if you have strayed from your own path, or remained in your own path, work hard for it. Work hard as well take care of you mental health and then stray from your own path. I have not strayed from my own path properly, and am only thinking of that. So, I don’t know what my future entails. But I know that whatever path I take and whatever path I am taking, I don’t want to do it half-heartedly. Like, my interest in making stickers led me into this world of people who are making their own stickers and selling them. It led me to innovate sticker-making with dried flowers, and I did that. The start of the sticker-making journey was not too aesthetic, neither it was good enough to be considered sticker. But I liked doing that, and it made me feel happy after a long time. I also decided to write a blog post and a diary entry (I was also not writing on my diary for few weeks). It was good, doing something craft-related as well as writing and typing this blog post. I know that this blog post might not feel so refined in terms of the content, but I hope to write and post more, and will hope to correct myself more.

Hope to write more and post my posts and not keep them in draft folder for longer.

-An Anonymous_Indian_writer